Chasing Destiny (Silver Tip Pack Book 2) Read online

  Nash growled, his eyes wild.

  “This is your pack. Vaughn. Let him the fuck go, Nash!”

  Maybe it was his name, or the urgency of my voice, but on a pained whine, Nash let him go and rolled off him.

  He shifted to his human form as he lay on his back in the dirt, and I straddled him. Gripping his face, I stared into his eyes, which were still wild and unfocused. This wasn’t normal. In our Were forms, we were still us, our brains knew right and wrong.

  His chest heaved as a bit of the real Nash creeped back into his blue eyes. This was untimely as hell, but straddling Nash while both of us were naked caused arousal to hit me like a slap. Nash was sweating and bloody beneath me, breathing hard. He’d just dominated the fuck out of Vaughn in a fight. To defend me. And I was animalistic enough to get hard at that. I wanted his lean body rutting against mine, his teeth sinking into my neck. I could already feel my hole getting wet with slick liquid, a result of my arousal, which would ease his way inside of me.

  Nash’s nostrils flared, and he sniffed once, twice, before shoving me off him. He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, his eyes back to wild now. The confidence that had been there, the satisfaction over what he’d done, had vanished, and all that was in its place was panic.

  I rose to my feet, but he was already jogging away. “Nash!” I called after him, my gait slower because of my injured thigh. “Wait!”

  He ignored me.

  “Fucking bastard,” I muttered as I walked over to Vaughn, who was being tended to by Pace. “You okay?”

  Vaughn nodded. “Yeah, I mean, terrified as shit, but also that was badass, huh?”

  “You’re a crazy bastard.”

  Vaughn’s eyes were huge. “Yeah, but did you see him fight?”

  “Of course I did,” I snapped at him. “Finish the tour. I need to talk to Nash.”

  When I turned to find the big Were, he was still running, his long legs eating up the ground between the training area and his hut. I sprinted after him, not bothering with my clothes. Why was he running?

  He reached his hut and quickly slipped through the door. I knew he was about to lock me out, so I was right there, throwing myself into the small space and shutting the door behind me.

  He stood in the center of the room, back to me, his broad shoulders heaving. His thick thighs were corded with tension, and his firm ass drew my eyes like a magnet.

  Connecting to other Weres had always been my strength. Dare asked me to be a negotiator among pack squabbles, to soothe hurt feelings. I was rarely at a loss on what to say, and touching was common among our pack. Physical communication was our thing.

  But with Nash, I felt helpless. He didn’t respond to me like other Weres did, and he was keeping secrets, ones that I feared could destroy him or us. So I stood staring at his back, wishing I could figure out what to do.

  He whirled around and moved so fast I didn’t even have a chance to blink. His body crashed into mine, and then we were on the ground, him on top of me. Our lips met—finally, finally!—in a tangle of need like I’d never felt in my life. Well, maybe one time, and that had involved him too.

  He tasted better than I’d imagined all these years, like fresh air, and I licked into his mouth as he bucked against me. His hard cock brushed along mine, and I made a keening sound as I rotated my hips up against him.

  He held my head in his hands like I was precious, yet aggressively possessed me with his mouth and teeth. Sharp bites of pain arced down my neck as he nibbled along my vein, every pulse shooting right down to my cock, where it leaked pre-come between us.

  I raked my nails down his back, hard, wanting to draw blood, wanting confirmation he was real. I palmed his ass and tugged him against me tighter. I lifted my legs and wrapped them around his waist, wanting him to fuck me, to fill me up. He shifted to the side and reached down, fisting both of our dicks in his big hand and beginning to pump.

  “Yesssss,” I hissed, my vision blurring as he squeezed tight, almost too tight. He still held my head in his other hand, holding me down, not letting me lift it up to kiss him. I was forced to watch him as he panted my name like a prayer. The smell of us was intoxicating, our blood, our sweat, our come. I was lost in a haze as my orgasm ripped through me.

  “Nash!” I cried out, as I came in his fist, vaguely feeling his dick pulse against mine. He said something that I couldn’t decipher before shoving his face into my neck on a long, low moan.

  I blinked, the aftershocks of my orgasm still rippling through me. My arms fell to the ground on either side of my body, but Nash didn’t move, his body splayed on top of mine, his face in my neck where he huffed quietly.

  I might have fallen asleep for a minute or two, but I came awake when I felt Nash move. I blinked my eyes to see him on his stomach between my legs, his blond head bent as he steadily lapped with his soft tongue at our combined releases on my stomach.

  I lifted a hand, and he flinched. I stilled, and then his gaze lifted to me, but he didn’t stop, continuing to clean my skin. I was growing hard again, but Nash ignored the head of my refilling erection pressing against him. Instead, he ran his tongue over my balls, my shaft, nuzzling into my groin and whiffing softly at the concentrated scent there.

  I’d had a partner or two clean me after sex, but it was usually a precursor to another round, an easy way to turn me on again, something they thought I would like.

  But that wasn’t what Nash was doing. His eyes were closed, his long, light-colored lashes tinged with liquid—tears?—as he worked me over slowly. This was for him, for us, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it. My heart pounded rapidly in my chest, so loud that I thought he’d hear it too. I ran my fingers through his hair, then swiped my thumb across his lashes. I placed the digit in my mouth. Salty.

  Nash didn’t stop until I was clean, and even then, his tongue kept working, swirling around my hips, my bellybutton, the cuts of my abs, then up to suck lightly on my nipples.

  My body felt heavy, tired from the fighting and the fucking. I wasn’t sure how we got from tearing each other apart to this, but I wasn’t going to argue. For the first time in a long time, that itch in me settled, calmed.

  When Nash laid his head on my chest, his breath gusting over my damp skin, I closed my eyes and for a little while, I could pretend there was only us in the world.

  I woke up to the smell of food. The door of our hut was slightly ajar, revealing that the sun was already dipping below the horizon. I was on the bed, and rolled over to see Nash sitting on the floor in front of two plates. He gestured to the untouched one. “Hungry?”

  “Starving.” I slid to the floor, feeling boneless, and picked up a slice of bread and some hard cheese, along with some ground chicken that looked like it’d been rolled into balls and baked. I bent one knee and rested my wrist on it, eating but more interested in Nash than anything. He was filling out more, looking like the adult Nash I’d always thought he would become. The memory of his tongue on my skin made my face heat.

  He was quiet, eating his food quickly before leaning back on his hands to watch me.

  I broke the ice on what needed to be said. “So you want to talk about what happened on the training grounds?”

  He ducked his head. “I’m sorry. I’ll apologize to Vaughn.”

  “Sure, although Vaughn thought it was thrilling as fuck. I’m a little worried though.”

  “I thought he was hurting you,” he mumbled.

  “Well, yeah, of course he was. We were fighting.”

  He blew out a breath and lifted his head, but wouldn’t look at me. “I guess some of my…” He pointed at his head. “Signals are crossed up here. You’re pack, and you’re Bay, so…I don’t know.”

  I didn’t know either. Sure, he was defending me, but his lack of understanding when he’d been in Were form was concerning. Maybe he was still adjusting to being around us. We’d cool out on the training until he had his bearings.

  “Tell me about life back at the Silver Tip
compound,” he said, changing the subject. “Dare is alpha now?”

  I nodded. “Veron challenged mom ten years ago. When she fell, Dare challenged Veron immediately and killed him.”

  “Dare is a good pack leader?”

  “Oh yeah.” I grinned, thinking about my brother. He’d done so much for the pack and put them first. He was stern and overly serious, although Reese had lightened him up a bit. “He’s very much our mom’s son. He’s worked hard to build up our crops so we’re self-sufficient, and he’s arranged trade with nearby packs.”

  “And your position in the pack?”

  “I’m part of the guard. Me, Rua, and G.”

  He smiled at that. “That’s a great team.”

  “It is,” I said. “And Dare has been working to build a team to study Noweres, how the virus started, a cure. It’s his new passion, and I’m pretty excited about it.”

  Nash didn’t react to that, his expression wiping clean. “That’s good.”

  “Why do you say it like that?”

  “Like what?”

  “Monotone, with no expression.”

  His brow furrowed. “I don’t know. That’s just how I reacted.”

  I narrowed my eyes in suspicion, but changed the subject. “He’ll be really interested in the ruebane.”

  “I’m sure.” His voice was softer, and his gaze dropped back down to his plate. “The pack is happy?”

  “Yeah, we’re happy. Couples feel safe to breed, so we’ve got plenty of novuses running around.”

  Nash’s eyes lifted. “Do you?”

  “Do I what?”

  “Do you have any offspring?”

  “Oh, no, I don’t. But Dare does. A son named Mav.”

  Nash nodded, his shoulders relaxing slightly.

  I couldn’t read him like I could when we’d been teenagers. He’d never talked much, but we always had a link. I’d known what he was thinking based on the crinkle of his eyes, the form of his mouth. He was guarded now, his face frustratingly neutral. Back then, I knew his motives, his past, his goals. Now, I knew nothing, so I had zero baseline to analyze his emotions or lack thereof. I finished my food and leaned back against the bed. “Can I ask you one question?”

  He didn’t answer, just gazed at me steadily. I took that as a yes.

  “Did you leave willingly?”

  His lips turned down. “Leave the pack?”

  “Yeah, you were fifteen, and you’d just gone through your first change. I used to think maybe you—”

  He shoved the plates aside with a swipe of his large hand and crouched in front of me. He gripped my head and stared into my eyes. “Bay.” His voice was an admonishment.

  Irritation pricked up my spine, and I shoved his hands away. “Don’t Bay me. I didn’t know. You disappeared in the confusion of Lee turning…” Shit, now tears were forming. I thought about my sister often, but I didn’t like to think about that day, the day she died and became undead, thanks to a pack of Noweres too close to our walls. I blinked rapidly and pushed his shoulder so he rocked back on his heels. “I needed you then. I needed you so badly, and you were gone. No trace. Just gone.” My voice cracked. “I just need to know if it was your choice to leave.”

  He didn’t reach for me again. His expression was a blank slate while I was trembling with the effort to hold myself together. Finally, he said slowly, “It wasn’t my decision to leave you, Bay. Not at all. Never.”

  I hadn’t realized how much of a weight that question had been on my shoulders until I heard the answer. I exhaled roughly, running a palm over my face. “Okay.”

  “You thought it was my choice to leave?” His voice was soft. “All this time…” He looked away. His expression was no longer blank, myriad emotions playing out over his features. Finally, he shook his head and stood, but not before I saw guilt in his eyes. He turned his back to me, shoulders heaving as he inhaled. “I’m sorry.”

  I stood up slowly and took a step toward him. “But it wasn’t your choice, so it’s not your fault. And I know now, so it’s okay.”

  He turned around, and he looked so tired, in a way he hadn’t just a minute ago. “Yeah, you’re right. I guess so.”

  I went for a smile, even though I didn’t feel it. The way he was holding himself worried me.

  He waved a hand to the bed. “I’m going to get some sleep. I exercised while you slept.”

  “Sure, yeah.” I moved out of the way as he climbed onto the pallet. “I’ll, uh, clean up here, maybe go visit Dal and Vaughn.”

  Nash settled onto the bed with his back to me. “Okay.”

  “We leave tomorrow!” I tried to make my voice cheery.

  A shudder went through his body. “Yeah.”

  He fell asleep within seconds, and I watched him for a long time, the steady rise and fall of his chest, his long feet, sinewy calves and thighs. I cursed whatever had separated us all these years, because no matter what happened between us physically, I feared the emotional divide was something that we’d never close. And that made me want to rage. Instead, I shifted into my werewolf form and took off outside of the hut, intent on running myself ragged.

  Chapter Six

  When I stepped out of Nash’s hut the next morning, the pack novuses were already up, playing tag in the soft grass. One ran into me and stumbled back, then growled at me, baring his blunt teeth. I pretended to cower, and he ran off with his chest puffed out, whooping to his friends.

  A soft chuckle made me turn my head. Nash leaned against the frame of the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest, watching me. “I remember being that age, before our first change, when we were so eager to be grown up.”

  “Hey, speak for yourself,” I said. “I was a tough little guy.”

  Nash laughed. “If by tough, you mean you had a smart mouth, then yes.”

  “My smart mouth saved our asses dozens of times.” I swiped at the grass and tore a blade, sticking it in my mouth to chew on. “I found ways to cover up our many infractions, like stealing bread from the kitchens overnight.”

  Nash raised his eyebrows. “You forget that none of those infractions were my idea. So if it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t have had any trouble to get out of.”

  I grinned at him. “But I made life interesting.”

  He shook his head at me with an indulging smile. “You’re still making life interesting.” He reached out and tugged me to him, snuffling his nose into my hair. He’d held me all night, and this morning he looked stronger. It was amazing how fast he’d recovered after a couple days of full meals and proximity to his pack members. His casual touches thrilled me, because they were familiar—what I was used to getting from my pack.

  “Can’t stop scenting you,” he said. “I tell myself to leave you alone, stop touching you, then I get a sniff of your scent and I need more.”

  The feeling was mutual. Nash’s scent was like a drug to me. “Well, I like it. You could scent around my dick too if you want.”

  Nash pushed me away with a laugh. “Let’s go find Pace. Today’s the day we leave, right?”

  I stretched my arms over my head, eager to be alone with Nash again. There was so much I wanted to feel with him. One quick hand job wasn’t enough to satisfy how much I wanted him. “Yep, today’s the day. I’m eager to get back. I miss Dare and Reese.” We began to walk toward the main building. “Oh, remember I told you about Dare’s son, Mav? He’s cute as shit.” I glanced at some of the werewolf dwellings where the pack lived. “Actually, I should bring him back something. Are any of the wolves craftsmen here?”

  Nash pointed to a small hut with a potted flower out in front. “Yeah, right there, in fact. A wolf named Tru makes colored chalk.”

  “Chalk?”

  “You’ll see.” As we approached the door, he said, “I haven’t ventured out of my hut much. These wolves know about me, but aren’t used to seeing me, so I’m sure a Were knocking at the door will be a little scary at first.” As he rapped on the door, I did my best to look as
non-threatening as possible.

  A short, rotund wolf answered the door. When he caught sight of us, he startled and his friendly smile quickly shifted to one of caution. He was sliding the door shut when I spoke up. “I’m sorry to surprise you like this, but we only want to buy some…” I glanced at Nash.

  “Chalk,” Nash supplied.

  “Chalk,” I echoed, with the biggest smile I had.

  His gaze shifted to Nash, who gestured to the novuses playing in the field behind us. “I saw them playing with it the other day. We’re leaving today, and we wanted to purchase some for the novuses in his pack.”

  I didn’t miss that he hadn’t referred to the Silver Tip pack as his. I wanted to know why, and I planned to remain attached to his side until he coughed it all up.

  The wolf was still hesitant. “Mates aren’t home. They are guards with Pace…”

  “I promise you don’t need your mates,” I said. “We only want the chalk.”

  He studied us for another moment, then nodded. “Okay, um, give me a moment.”

  “Sure.” Nash used the soft voice I remembered, the one that made everyone feel at ease. The wolf smiled at him then, and disappeared back into his home, leaving the door open.

  “It’s your pack too,” I said through clenched teeth, unwilling to let it go.

  He sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. I told you this was hard for me.”

  “That’s why I’m trying to be okay with this, but I don’t understand.”

  “You couldn’t,” he bit off.

  “That’s because you haven’t told me anything yet.”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “Try me,” I challenged.

  When the wolf returned to the door, Nash and I were facing each other, lips curled back. The wolf gasped and dropped the basket he was holding. It hit the ground with a thunk.

  I cleared my throat and turned on the smile again, as if I hadn’t been about to tackle Nash to the ground. “So sorry, we’re just having a disagreement. Unrelated. So…is that chalk?” I pointed to a couple round pastel balls that had fallen from the basket.